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Make Sex More Exciting! Tips For Men.

moderator — Thu, 30 Jul 2009 00:29:43 +0000

Husband, how would you like to take your lovemaking experiences for both you and your wife to a higher level?

You can do it and all it takes is swallowing a little pride and loosening up a bit. Let me explain…

First of all, for most men, few things are more dissatisfying than making love to a woman who doesn’t move a muscle or make a sound – no matter what he does to or for her.

And yet, based on the feedback of many women, their husband goes through the act of lovemaking in a passionless, expressionless, emotionless, sterile way. Oh sure, he’ll have a bit of a scene when he climaxes but up until that point, there’s just not enough spirit there to really excite his wife.

So, the first thing a husband can do to heat things up during lovemaking is make some noise. Maybe even make a lot of noise. Be expressive. Let your lady HEAR that she really pleasures you.

But, don’t stop there. Let her also SEE via your body language that she really knows how to take care of you just right. And, let her FEEL both from the energy coming from you and from the touch of your body that she’s doing a fantastic job.

Do this even if it’s not true and it will soon enough become true!

To emphasize this point, a dildo is never as good for a woman as the real deal precisely for the reason that there’s no life to a dildo. Think about it from your perspective…would you rather be with an exciting woman who lets you know that she enjoys what you’re doing to and for her or a lifeless blow-up doll?

Well, if you’re a normal man, it’s self-evident that you’d rather be with a passionate woman – just like your wife would rather be with a passionate man.

So, the next time you make love with your wife, SHOW HER SOME LIFE! Rev things up by putting some passion into it – instead of just being the human equivalent of a dildo to your wife.

Another thing that some women complain to me about is that when it comes to lovemaking, their man has gotten LAZY. He just lays back, gets comfortable, and pushes all the work of making the lovemaking experience good onto his wife.

As a man, you know yourself that if you and another man were assigned to a job and you were doing all the work while the other fellow sat idly by, too lazy to do any work, you’d quickly come to resent him, right?

My friend, it’s the same with your wife. If she consistently has to do all the work in lovemaking, she will soon progress to the point where she DOES NOT enjoy it and eventually to the point she RESENTS it.

Sure, if your wife’s a normal woman, she wants to give you pleasure but that doesn’t mean she wants to carry the whole load of having to pleasure you AND herself.

So, take shared responsibility for making the lovemaking experience fun and exciting and it will be the fun and exciting experience it’s meant to be. Take shared responsibility for giving and receiving pleasure and the lovemaking experience will be mutually pleasurable.

Now, let me tie all of the above together…

The best lovemaking is a joint-adventure-exploration. The husband gives and takes. The wife gives and takes. One does something for the other and then the other does something back. It’s a switching back and forth of CONTROL and ROLE.

As simplistic as this may sound, many women complain that their husband does nothing more than “bore in” as he tries to rush both he and his wife to a climax – or even worse, he rushes forward to HIS own climax without regard to hers.

Here’s how a man can apply this “back and forth” concept to create a more memorable, more exciting lovemaking experience for both he and his wife…

As the lovemaking experience progresses, alternate the scene between dominant and submissive and between naughty and nice. Alternate so that you’re dominant and a little later your wife’s the dominant one. Alternate so that at some points, things are naughty and at others they are nice.

So for example, at one moment, a husband can take a position of dominant power while he holds his wife’s wrists over her head with one hand and her chin with his other hand and passionately kisses her. Later, he can shift his wife into a position of power – perhaps as she gets on top of him he switches into a mini-role-play and says something like, “Yes mistress! I am your sex-slave…I love the power you have over me…”

At one moment, a man can tell his woman what he wants her to do. Then, he can shift things over so that his woman is telling him what she want him to do. At one moment, a man can put his wife in the position he wants her in and after a bit, he leads his wife into her putting him in the position she wants him in.

At one moment, a man can tell his wife to get on her knees because he’s going to do her doggy style just like the naughty girl inside of her likes to be done but at another moment, he’s sweetly whispering “I love you’” into his wife’s ear while they make nice, quiet love in the missionary position but then he switches back to naughty by switching them both from intercourse to oral.

This kind of back and forth is a huge turn on for women – and it makes things a lot spicier for men too. This sharing of the control – of directing the action – and the switching of roles is a big part of the fun.

I can promise you this…if a husband and wife will banter back and forth between dominant and submissive and between naughty and nice every time they make love, their sex life will NEVER become boring or stale.

Husband, this is Calle Zorro here and I want you to become such an excellent lover — such a masterful “Wife-Seducer” — that your wife tries to http://www.InitiateIntimacy.com” rel=”nofollow”>initiate sex with you every time she can get her hands on you. I promise you, this will forever improve the http://www.InitiateIntimacy.com” rel=”nofollow”>intimacy between you and your wife. Go here: http://www.InitiateIntimacy.com
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Is This Sex Dirty?

moderator — Fri, 24 Jul 2009 05:52:24 +0000

Every couple has one thing that they seem to fight (or at least disagree) about over and over again. For some, couples, the big struggle is how to raise the children, how to spend their money or how much time they should spend together. One of the biggest problems that couples experience is with sex or intimacy.
The way most people think, men only think about sex. I’m sure you’ve heard the bogus statistic that the average man thinks about sex every ten seconds, and these types of things that get passed on just seem to set the stereotype in. On the other hand, it often is said that women want to talk about love and intimacy, but could live without sex. This stereotype is reinforced by soap operas and romance novels which are marketed at women, and have a whole lot of romance, but usually aren’t filled with a bunch of sex.
But when the bedroom doors close or people aren’t looking, you’ll find that these stereotypes are shattered. There are so many men that want to talk about their feelings and intimacy, while women just want passionate sex or even sex with no strings attached. Repeating stereotypes is not what we want to do here, because for every example you give, you can definitely find ten people who break the mold.
Let’s forget about stereotypes and work to help out our relationship instead. You don’t have to be an expert in marriage or sex to understand enough to help your relationship.
What are Sex and Intimacy?
Maybe we need to define intimacy and sex before we go any further. What is sex and what it intimacy? Some people say that sex and intimacy aren’t the same, that they have the different definitions; other might say that they are the same. If you would ask your partner this question would they answer it the same way as you would? Is kissing defined as sex, intimacy or other? What about talking dirty to each other, masturbation and having sex?
If you’ve know what your marriage blueprint is, you may realize that this affects your feelings on the subject more than whether you are a man or woman. It doesn’t matter if you are a woman or a man, if you are a ‘wild thing’, you want your sexual freedom, and sex and intimacy could be described as one. You love getting naked, and don’t want any rules or talking with your partner.
If both partners in the relationship are wild things, the relationship will go smoothly as far as sex and intimacy go. But what happens if you and your partner have different ideas on what sex and intimacy involve. Can a relationship between a carefree wild thing and a pilgrim (who are often guided by their religious beliefs) work?
How does your religion shape your beliefs on sex, passion and romance? If you grew up thinking that sex was dirty or something that should only be done to create children, you probably can find beliefs of that in your relationships today. If, while growing up, you rebelled against that belief, you could be someone who is very open sexually. But if you just let that belief sink in, you may still be a bit more conservative when it comes to sex.
Should you change the way that you think to please your partner? Look at this example of a couple, and tell me what you think:
Mike wants his wife, Andrea to try to have anal sex with him. Andrea doesn’t like the idea, because she thinks that it is dirty and humiliating. She also adds that there aren’t any reasons to do it, and that it wouldn’t add anything to the relationship. What do you think? Can this add intimacy to their relationship, or will Mike harm his relationship by trying to change it.
What should couples do if they are disagreeing with their partner with their level of sex or intimacy? If one person wants to bring in an additional person for one wild night once in a while and the other is totally adamant about it, what can you do?

Ask Dr. Max about your Free Personalized Great Relationship Evaluation at http://www.MarriageBlueprint.com

Top Ten Tips for Phenomenal Sex

moderator — Wed, 22 Jul 2009 11:50:22 +0000

1. Communicate
Communication with your lover is the most important factor for not only a satisfying sexual relationship but for a relationship in general. If you do not communicate with your partner you can’t be satisfied. Many people falsely believe that their lover
can read their mind or that they should instinctively know how to please them. This is a very destructive belief for not only the sex, but also the relationship as a whole. Speak openly, directly and honestly. Be specific. Tell your partner where, when and how to touch you. Describe how much pressure, how much speed and the timing you need. Tell them what, when and how to say what you need to hear etc. Let them know when it feels good and when it doesn’t. Good communication involves the expression of feelings. Discuss your feelings, needs, desires, fears, embarrassments, expectations in and out of the bedroom in regard
to all aspects of the relationship. Good communication will increase intimacy and greater intimacy will lead to greater sex.

2. Be an Unselfish Lover
Be a selfless lover (meaning your goal is your pure desire to give your partner the pleasure they desire.) Don’t take each other for granted, which is easy to do if you have been together for a while and will kill your passion. Don’t pleasure your lover
according to what feels good for you, give them what you know they enjoy. Always tend to your partners needs as well as your own and you will be considered a good lover. Spend one lovemaking session devoted entirely to your lover. Make them feel special
and cherished. Express your love and appreciation freely and frequently outside of the bedroom as well as inside the bedroom. Don’t assume your lover knows how you feel. It needs to be verbalized. Say I love you or you are so beautiful, or you feel so good. Everyone wants to feel loved, valued and appreciated.
Remember that what occurs outside the bedroom greatly impacts what will occur in the bed.

3. Seek Variety
As the saying goes Variety is the spice of Life, and boredom is one of the main causes of unfaithfulness. If you keep a lot of variety in your positions and activities, you will never be bored. There are numerous books and videos that can give you new
suggestions or be creative and use your imagination. Try having sex in different places of the house or in a bathroom at the gas station, restaurant or some other place that is very exciting for you where you won’t get caught. Take a shower with your lover and
use your hands as the washrag. Soap them up and explore every inch, nook and cranny of their body. Savor them as if they were a fine a wine. This will elicit erotic, sensual, spiritual and physical energy in both of you and will also serve as a tool to
help you learn invaluable information about one another’s bodies. Get naked outside and make wild passionate love. I don’t believe there is anything more freeing, arousing and spiritual than being
naked outside and to make love with the feel of the elements upon your body. It gets you in touch with the primal basics and elicits uninhibited passions. Do things that are unique for you as a couple and you can keep the variety and spice while remaining a monogamous couple. Change your routine.

4. Be Spontaneous and Adventurous
Surprise your lover with something unusual and kinky. Yes Kinky! Be outrageous and adventurous. Show up at their work for lunch naked under your coat and flash them. Send them an invitation to a hotel for a hot night of sex. Role play one of your fantasies. Tell them you must have them at some unusual spot and take them passionately. Women, try not wearing your panties and bra and go through your daily activities. Not having a bra and panties on is very stimulating and will make you feel very sexy and erotic.
Tell your partner that you aren’t wearing any and you will drive them absolutely wild with the thought of it.

5. Be Present in the Here and Now.
Fully experience each touch, sensation, smell, movement, sound and taste while you are making love. Don’t allow your mind to slip into thoughts about work, children or fixing dinner etc. Stay completely focused on your partner and your experience. Allow yourself to become totally immersed in the pleasurable sensations you are giving and receiving.

6. Know Your Own Body and Desires
If you don’t know what excites you and pleases you, then your lover can’t either. Explore your own body and discover what you like and don’t like. Find out what arouses you and makes you roar. Make love with yourself. You can really drive your lover wild by allowing them to watch you pleasure yourself.

7. Make Sex a Priority
Relationships are the most important aspect of our lives and sex is a crucial component of your intimate relationship. Make time for lovemaking. Don’t push it off. It should be one of the biggest priorities in your life. When sex is pushed aside desire and passion will dwindle. The more you engage in sex the more your desire will grow.

8. Pursue Your Lover with Unbridled Passion
It is a great aphrodisiac for both female and male to see and feel desire and passion in their lover’s eyes and actions. Let your lover know how deeply you want them. Tear their clothes off and take them passionately. Let them hear you delight in them.
When making love, tell them how much you enjoy their body or how good they feel to you. Let loose with total abandon.

9. Know Your Partner’s Hot Zones
Taking the time to learn what makes your lovers motor run is one of the most important ingredients for great sex. You can never know your lover too much. Pay attention to when and what your lover responds to and learn what they need. Store it in your mind and be sure to use it frequently. When your lover is pleasured and satisfied then they want to reciprocate and please you even more, and thus sexual satisfaction is heightened for both partners. When you know how to please your lover, their desire for you increases and they will want sex more often. Knowing your partner and making a point to please them is an act of love; it shows them they are important to you and that you care about their needs. You should know your lovers love buttons like the back of your hand.

10. Be an Oral Connoisseur
Being a skilled oral lover is a very important component of a couple’s sexual relationship for both the male and the female. There are few things more pleasurable for either man or woman than to be savored, devoured and satisfied orally by their lover.
It is one of the most intimate gifts we can give one another. Pleasuring your lover orally has become an integral part of lovemaking. One of the great aspects of oral sex is that it can be a part of foreplay or the main course and there are so many ways to explore it. Giving oral pleasure to your lover is an
ultimate act of unselfishness, giving, caring and loving.

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Passionate Sex: How to Overcome Boredom in the Bedroom

moderator — Wed, 22 Jul 2009 06:41:25 +0000

Q: I love my husband, but somewhere along the line we’ve become more like friends than lovers. We had an amazing sex life early in our relationship but now we’re lucky if we have sex once a month, and when we do it’s pretty unremarkable. I really enjoy sex and I’d like to make it a regular part of our life again. Any suggestions?

A: First of all, you need to take solace in the fact that you’re not alone with this problem. Most couples in long-term relationships note a marked reduction in the quantity and quality of sex as the years progress. When you’re wrapped up in the heady euphoria of a new relationship, it’s hard to imagine that the grinding reality of daily life can ever dampen sexual desire, but, voila! Here you are, years later, juggling kids and a mortgage and a new career, and sex just isn’t a priority. And the first step in rejuvenating a lackluster sex life is the awareness of this natural ebb and flow.

Providing there aren’t medical reasons for your dwindling sex life (if you’re not sure, have a doctor check you out), there are some simple ideas you can incorporate into your life now that can help you and your partner resuscitate your sexual desire:

1. Prioritize sex.

Both partners need to make a commitment to nurture the physical aspect of the relationship. It’s a big step to acknowledge that you’ve been neglecting passion. But once you do, you can begin having the discussions that will get you thinking about sex and eventually bumping it up on your list of priorities. There is no shame in saying, “Hey, we got caught up in life and left something behind that we really miss. Let’s agree to openly and honestly work on this together.”

2. Plan for sex.

Once you’ve both agreed to make sex a priority, it’s time for some planning. You may be thinking: “Sex should be a spontaneous, natural experience. Planning for it will ruin the magic.” Not at all! Quite the contrary: many of the most enjoyable, rewarding things we experience in life are things we must plan for. And when couples put effort into creating the time and space they need for physical intimacy, they temporarily take themselves away from the stresses of their hectic lives. This planned-for time and space actually allows spontaneity to flourish.

3. Plan for romance.

A word for some of you men out there (you know who you are): Planning for sex doesn’t mean buying a new multivitamin and sprinting into the bedroom for a quickie. The type of sex that fosters a couple’s connection occurs within the context of a loving, intimate relationship. When you nurture romance and make your partner feel special, you set the stage for an evening of passion and great sex. Romance doesn’t have to be costly or time consuming (of course, it can if you want it to be). A sensual body massage with your partner’s favorite lotion can go a long way in setting just the right mood for passionate love making. Pay attention to romance first, and sex will follow.

4. Become playful and provocative.

Couples in long-term relationships need to revisit the art of flirtation. Flirting and teasing are great ways to fan the flames of desire. Have you ever noticed how people in a new relationship excel at teasing? Whether seducing each other at the supermarket or while sitting at a red light, new lovers discover ways to turn each other on in the most ordinary of circumstances. Unbeknownst to them, these couples are actively creating opportunities to flirt and entice each other. Are you ready to enter the game of flirting with your partner?

5. Nurture your sexual attitude.

The art and skill of flirting starts with a particular attitude. The most important part of this attitude involves giving yourself permission to be playful and provocative with your partner. Without permission, you will remain inhibited and lose the freedom necessary to have a fulfilling sex life. Learn to give yourself permission to have fun with your partner.

6. Talk about sex.

Your assumptions about what your partner enjoys sexually might be standing in the way of a great sex life. You’re both evolving–your partner’s tastes in music, food, and clothes have probably changed over the years, so why do you assume that his/her sexual desires are the same as when you first met? Ask your partner what turns him/her on today. Don’t assume you know (even if you believe you know your partner really well). Maybe there is something s/he would like you to try sexually that s/he would find exciting. Information about your partner’s sexual desires and fantasies can go a long way in creating an exciting sex life.

7. Become less predictable.

Some couples fall into a rut because their sexual routines have become too predictable. While familiarity is comforting and helps build trust, it can also become a little boring when it comes to sex. Uncertainty and novelty feed excitement and can give your sex life an electrical charge. Experiment together (there are many good books available to help couples work on improving their sex life) and create a shared sense of adventure in the bedroom (or the living room, or the study…)

Is your relationship worth protecting? Are you ready to make your marriage everything it can be?

To discover more relationship tips, visit http://StrengthenYourRelationship.com/ and sign up for Dr. Nicastro’s FREE Relationship Toolbox Newsletter.

As a bonus, you will receive the popular free reports: “The four mindsets that can topple your relationship” and “Relationship self-defense: Control the way you argue before your arguments control you.”

Richard Nicastro, Ph.D. is a psychologist and relationship coach who is passionate about helping couples protect the sanctuary of their relationship. Rich and his wife founded LifeTalk Coaching, an internet-based coaching business that helps couples strengthen their relationships.
Increase My Vertical

Dear Boomer. is Your Sex Life Normal?

moderator — Sun, 12 Jul 2009 17:57:10 +0000

Do you ever find yourself wondering if your sex life is normal? Do you equate frequency with normalcy? Do you compare your sex life with your friends’? If yes don’t worry you are not alone! A lot us sometimes fret needlessly about our sex-lives and sex-drives, thanks to the numerous myths about sex. The following are some of the most common ones;

Myth- Going straight to Sleep after a romantic dinner is not normal.

Fact- It is in fact perfectly normal to want to sleep after a fulfilling meal. Good food can in fact kill your sex-drive and make you sleepy. It’s actually better to have sex before you set out for a romantic meal!

Myth- It’s not normal if you (women) don’t have an orgasm during intercourse.

Fact- What’s more important than an orgasm is how much pleasure you give each other? You may have enjoyed the fore-play but may still not have an orgasm, don’t worry, its normal! In fact according to some recent research studies most women don’t have an orgasm during intercourse, but it doesn’t mean they don’t enjoy it!

Myth- Men always want sex.

Fact- Completely untrue! Just like women men may not always be in the mood to have sex. In fact this myth is responsible for men’s performance anxiety and sometimes erection trouble as well. It’s because men believe that it’s normal to always want sex and they worry about their being normal, when they don’t want sex!

Myth- It’s not normal to be interested in sex after a certain age.

Fact- False again! It’s biologically and psychologically normal to be interested in sex till the end of your life!

Myth: It’s normal for women to lose their sex-drive after menopause.

Fact- The truth is far from it! Many women actually enjoy sex more after menopause since they no longer have to worry about getting pregnant. Also thanks to hormone replacement therapy (HRT) many women aren’t plagued with the low sex drive and vaginal dryness often associated with menopause.

Myth- You must have sex at least 3 times a week.

Fact- As long as you are both satisfied with the frequency, even if you have sex once in two weeks, it’s normal! Don’t put too much stress on quantity as long as you are both happy with your sex life. If you are not then you will have to talk it out with your partner and figure out the reason for his/her lack of interest.

Finally, good sex is what makes you and your partner happy, everything else is a myth!

Have personal questions? Care to chime in? Come join Boomer Yearbook and make your voice heard.

www.boomeryearbook.com is a social networking site connecting the Baby Boomer generation. Share your thoughts, rediscover old friends, or expand your mind with brain games provided by clinical psychologist Dr. Karen Turner. Join today to discover the many ways we are helping Boomers connect for fun and profit.